I tried to break up with her but,she couldnt let me ago, how cant she,shes been saying were drifting apart were nothing you dont care about me just stop it.and now shes depressed,or think she is, and Im the one getting all the thoughts all the sadness. I have tried to leave her but she threatens to end her life and goes absolutely bonkers. I have become very weary, weak and helpless toward her, every piece of support I give her is taken with offence, as an insult of her character or some other negative quam brewed inside her hyperactive mind. Im in a LDR myself too although I have never met her IRL. She would start crying, shes wanted to leave home and then denied it the next day, I try to get her to talk about whats going on but she wont. i dont know what to do. Relationships are supposed to be about equality. He is also seeing a psychiatrist who has advised he doesnt work I am doing 3 jobs to pay for my divorce as he is going to go bankrupt with his business =- because he couldnt face going in to work except at lunch time. Healthy couples can chat about pretty much anything. I feel like if I do shell ask why I havent been talking to her, she wont message me for atleast 2 days if I do. You need to be comfortable with who you are. This is important: I have to tell you you will not find the cure, you can be there and support but please stop believing that it will make the problem go away. I have a battle on my hands, life has tried to tear me down before and I wont let it just yet..You choose to be happy, Woah that is one crazy situation both of you are dealing with. She keeps saying this like Im not a good person & I dont think Ill ever stop feeling this way I have given her reassurance, saying Im here for it through the good and bad, but fuck it seems like Im talking to a brick wall sometimes. I don't have the same motivation and drive and care about myself like I did when I was single. Obviously it isnt making her any happier as things are.. She relies on me sitting down and talking sense to her, but I too feel like a caretaker, an older sibling or even a parent sometimes. Gently but strongly. She doesnt like it when I do my own thing or want to go out or have something in my life other than her. I consider myself in recovery. Maybe your girlfriend finds talking to her friend, who also has the same kind of problem, helpful in some way. Please fill out all required fields to submit your message. Long distance, depressed girlfriend, university, feeling trapped, spending too much time and sacrificing too many things for the happiness of the other person in the relationship. Now she stopped the medications for a month ago, and still no affection what so ever. It just makes me feel worse, plus medication takes 63-64 days to actually kick in. Having your sh$t together isnt exactly essential for survival anymore. Before the depression she was great, and we saw each other very often. So it can really, truly suck when you realize your relationship is dragging you down. The reason Yt5s.io is the best youtube downloader . Warm regards, If you are tired or stressed I cant do sex. she undergoing medications and therapy but nothing could help her. Especially when theyre attractive they can just bounce around from bf to bf. Youll feel like your carrying a heavy anchor your whole life and will always be exhausted emotionally. We talked (argued) about the lack of sex and how distant we are and she said that she doesnt feel any of these feelings, and that sometimes we doesnt feel comfortable thinking about sex. Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) Dear M, If you would like to find a mental health professional for your girlfriend, you can start finding therapists in your area by entering your city or ZIP code into the search field on this page: https://www.goodtherapy.org/find-therapist.html. And thats happiness isnt even happiness half the time, its just a less bad mood. Being long-distance, you are actually BETTER OFF than if you were local! She thinks I must be sleeping with someone else & she is not the object of my desire. (Not married) Good luck and remember the love bit. The fact that shes still hanging around him enforces that theyve cheated. Depression is a serious issue that is very difficult to understand. We started dating and since after 2 months shes been depressed. Can anyone help me and tell me what can i do?. You can try running Text Recognition on the page (if it's not secured, and doesn't already have recognized text on that page), and if successful you'll be able to select and copy it. I have a problem and cant find anyone to tell Found that website and the posts here are very similar to mine. We kept going on, and little by little she started becoming more and more away from me. 3. My girlfriend is dragging me back into depression with her own personal problems. Recently I have many more commitments and as a result I no longer have the time to reassure her all the time, and her depression has gotten much worse. And it started to bring me down even more. She says she feels okay when she clearly doesnt, when I give her a hug during this time, she tenses up, keeps shaking her head, and really hates herself for the way she is. It drove me to breakdown myself. That sounds like my issue too. Dont worry youre not alone! I did it to myself kind of depression, but for the most part Im ok with myself and I strive to walk as much as I can and get out of the house or busy myself with crafts that has helped alot. Dragged Down. Can still manage to go to pool every Tuesday night til 2am. When I asked her what she thinks about the future, she said it wont be happiness and that it is impossible to be happy, and that she never imagine about our relationship anymore. Seems like a pattern, a thing to analyse better. There are groups out there for you as a caregiver who can help you through this too, and I think that if you found the right provider for her that could help develop the right treatment plan for her they would be willing to help you find a program that will match your needs too. The act of moving things out can be difficult to deal with. i feel it but i but i just cant deal with being her friend in school and more outside, i cant do it in school. Any thoughts or suggestions would be sincerely appreciated. Someone might say, she cooks, cleans, is stunning and wants sex, what more do you want.. See what I mean? Let her take the step and compliment her if she completes it. Good Luck!! Should I just except it and appreciate the five minutes we talk a day? Im not saying what will happen, only what very possibly can. yesterday she said dating isnt working for either of us, the things that we need to change are things that cant chnange. When someone puts you down, deal with it by not immediately reacting to him. Let she feels that you are proud of her. She did not want to fight, and when I thought finally thing would become better, she just said that she did not have time or energy to focus on the relationship, and wanted to focus on herself. It would be way worse, and if you leave, then the relationship wouldnt be as big of a crutch and she and you can move on and grow. Karen S., a business executive in her late 20s, had been with her boyfriend eight months when she fell into a funk. This often happens when too much stress causes hyperarousal, which can upset the balance between sleep and wakefulness, according to the National Sleep Foundation. Ive never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life. A woman goes through a break up, she goes out, cries half the time and gets her drinks paid for all night and has her choice of a half a dozen guys fighting over her. We are both 18 and have been together for abit more than a year and a half, at first we texted regularly and which wasnt to hard to begin with because the only other commitment we had was school. I even offered to pay for the consultation costs. My gf & I have been dating for only five months. After a year of being together i started to talk about how bad our sexlife and that it has changed, her reply was always that im comparing this to things i read on the internet and that what we had before is considered honeymoon period. Therapy and meds nothing will work. On my side my family is going through a very rough time and were worried about losing our home, Im going through a quarter-life crises where I dont know what I studied is the right thing for me, Im also really worried about my future because I dont know where Im heading in life. Setup Size: 8.9 GB. Than it all started to fade, she had weekly outbursts after we met, we had a lovely weekend, then, the other day, she was always very depressed or even aggressive, treating herself very badly, being jealous on my friends, depreciating herself. A few months ago she began self harming, and I apparently did something to upset her and she started talking about how she was going to commit suicide because of it. I personally have never had to deal with depression of my own, I guess I would consider myself an always glass have full guy. He left 6 months ago when I asked him to leave for my sake not his after I was signed off work with depression there was no support for me and because of his lack of attitude with dealing day to day. Or maybe it's because your partner is jealous, or mean, or absent. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you. Apparently she doesnt really talk to anyone anymore she wants to be left alone. Do something romantic. Then to know she will react & get angry is so wrong. I am moved by how exactly you also spoke for myself Wish we could go for a beer. I forgave her and forgot all of that. It drives me nuts when she sleeps all day. Look Ive been dealing with depression for years as well and yes at times i feel a bit hopeful and at other times i just want to die. She felt distanced by me, but in no way did i feel any different toward her. From then onwards,my girl friend got suffering from depression slowly.but I was not knowing that and she also didnt share anything to me. Im so hurt lately, and she doesnt give it a mind, and she doesnt barely talk to me on the late days. We are thinking of you and wishing you and your partner the very best! There is more to life than this, trust me. I have high blood pressure because of her. Once you enter your information, youll be directed to a list of therapists and counselors who meet your criteria. I always stopped everything to help her, to stay hours remind her how she is incredible. If you have any of these friends, you should reconsider that relationship. Do a "deep search" instead. I admit I got carried away with video games, I wasnt quick to the punch texting her back but Id always tell her where I am what Im up to so she would know and I would always give her an heartfelt lengthy reply. Sorry if I sound morbid but its devastating. (All is Hell) When that happens, it may be time for some serious reflection. She cannot afford therapy. But she just cries on the phone and says shes fine. I hope you will take another one and find some support for yourself. I feel for all of you guys! You have two choices. I always tell her I enjoy how she is my first thought when i wake up and the last. Life is can be cruel, tough and deceiving. I lost my faith in myself, in my abilities, in my attractiveness, I also lost my job because I was physically sick because of stress. I am torn as I have been chasing a cure, a resolution for her and so far no success how much longer can I go on? The best I could do for him was to let him go and wished him happy. I do not see a future with her but I get so torn up at the thought of leaving her to her depression and her situation, Im in the exact same situation as you gaz. Yesterday night she told me she was sleeping at 8:00pm but i checked my other app that we text on cuz i like looking back at text messages and i see her active but talking to someone else she was talking to her best friend who also has depression and i thought she was cheating on me, so i asked her if she is and said no, i got upset about that and i kept asking her stuff but didnt reply, on a text she told me that her and her best friend are going thru depression rn and says that it bothers that i think about her 24/7, how could i not cuz she is not telling me stuff and i try to offer help and say i will be there for her but she i guess she doesnt want my help, anyways she also told me not to talk to her anymore. Well, Ive dating this girl for the last half-year, after two years of deep depression, isolation, drugs & alcohol abuse and poverty. In cases of chronic depression, it is very common for partners to begin to feel more like caretakers than anything else. 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